What do I really want for myself? What do I really want for others? What do I really want for the relationship?
Once you’ve asked yourself what you want, add one more equally telling question: How would I behave if I really wanted these results?
Contrasting is a don’t/do statement that: • Addresses others’ concerns that you don’t respect them or that you have a malicious purpose (the don’t part). • Confirms your respect or clarifies your real purpose (the do part). For
Create a Mutual Purpose • When you are at cross-purposes, use four skills to get back to Mutual Purpose: • Commit to seek Mutual Purpose. • Recognize the purpose behind the strategy. • Invent a Mutual Purpose. • Brainstorm new strategies.
What story is creating these emotions?